[Cambot focuses in on...a pair of legs? They look to be blue eagle legs, although animated in a style reminiscent more of Sam's kind when they were babies. Maybe it's because he's an adult, but Cambot can't see anything but his legs.]

Cambot. My face is up here, if you please.

[Cambot tries to comply, but just can't seem to manage to lift up past Sam's legs. Sam just groans, and continues on with what he was going to say anyway.]

Something MUST be done about these! This is certainly not funny!

[From above floats a colored piece of paper with the phrase EAGLE SEASON on it. And then another. Aaaand another.]

I keep trying to remove these dangerous and tacky notices, but there seem to be more underneath! This is most inappropriate!

[The fliers are looking to pile up now...]

[Sam comes onscreen...at least, it looks like it could be Sam. Instead of a blue eagle, it’s an old white guy in a blue suit. He’s still got that same unibrow and Very Serious Expression, though.]

Everyone! It has come to my attention that I must give you a very, very. Important warning. Whatever you do, do not eat the apple pies! They are not. Safe.

[And then, for the first time ever, he looks down and seems to notice he’s not actually an eagle anymore.]

What. Is this.

[A VERY disgruntled blue eagle comes onto the screen. He looks like he has endured all manner of terrible things. He clears his throat before speaking.]

AHEM. Hello, people on this satellite. In my brief time here, it has come to my attention that there are many, many things wrong with this place!

Item one: there are many here wearing highly inappropirate clothing!

Item two: there are at least three people here with blue hair. Blue. Hair.

Item three: Some robots made fun of me the moment they spotted me. And they did not look like productive robots at all.

Item four: The machine in the cafeteria shot out eggs at my face. This is quite unsafe!

Item five: There are several people here whose hair could poke someone's eye out! That is very unsafe!

Item six: There is a tiger roaming around the decks, with no animal trainer in sight! This is incredibly unsafe!

Item seven: There is a bright pink pony bouncing around and tying balloons to things! That is the most unsafe of all!

Item eight: I suddenly appeared on this ship with no clue how it happened, and I need to be home instead!

All of these grievances must be addressed at once!