itsjustcambot | Fourinator

[The screen shows...a blank patch of wall for a second or two.]

Really. Really. Are we going to have to do this every time? I mean, I really thought you'd have this whole "show what you're recording" thing down by now, since, you know, you're a camera and all.

[The screen pans over to show Doof, who is looking a little less than impressed.]

There we go. Finally.

Aaaaaaanyway. I know I haven't been around for a while, but when that whole pony thing happened, it really threw off my plans. You ever try to build anything without thumbs? Much harder than it looks. So then I decided to build a DePonyinator, so I could, you know, not be a pony anymore. Of course, then I ran into that whole building-without-thumbs problem again, but I decided to try it anyway. Three bottles of mouthwash later and my mouth still tastes like screwdriver. Three whole bottles!

Well, the DePonyinator never actually got finished because I randomly stopped being a pony, so I decided to modify it. BEHOLD, SATELLITE OF LOVE!

[...and nothing happens. Doof frowns.]

Seriously. We practiced this. I say BEHOLD, SATELLITE OF LOVE! all dramatic-like, and you pan to the left to show off my latest Inator. Got it?

[The feed pans up and down - Cambot is nodding.]

Good. Okay, let's try that again. [He clears his throat.] BEHOLD, SATELLITE OF LOVE!

[Cambot pans obligingly to the left, showing off what looks like a very big ray gun.]

The TagWithActualLasersinator! See, I saw everyone playing with with the wimpy little laser guns, and I thought I'd make one of my own, except with actual lasers! It's in the name and everything. With this, I can be on my own team and not have to worry about getting picked last or any of those other crippling adolescent fears. All I have to do is just charge it up, like so... [He flips a switch and several lights on the Inator blink on.] ...and it will produce a laser beam powerful enough to punch through any solid object. I can win without even playing! And even better, I can use it to RULE THE TRI-STATE- I mean, THE SATELLITE OF LOVE!

...yes, I know it's against the rules and everything, sure, but- screw the rules, I have science! [He grins and steeples his fingers. Why yes, he has just secured his place as Most Evil Person On The Satellite. Take that, Evil-Sora-Clone-Person!] So! Who wants to play?

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[Oh God this guy again. Maes stares at the camera for a moment]

You do remember we're in space right? Are you TRYING to get yourself killed?

Well duh. That's why I'm trying to rule the satellite instead of the TRI-STATE AREA!

[Stare. Sighs]

Which is great and all, really. [Sarcasm ends] But you won't be ruling much of anyone if you blast a hole in the hull and release all of our oxygen into the void of space.

Well then, you had all better surrender so I don't do that, huh.

[Oh yeah. He's got this evil thing down.]

Or go find the space suits and seal off the deck you're on.

[So this is the first time Ratchet's thought to go and check out the network, just for kicks. If he's going to be stuck here and there was no real imminent threat, might as well, huh?

He kind of wishes he didn't now.

So you just get a whooole bunch of staring from a very awkward, very unimpressed Lombax.]

Oooookay, I can see what they mean about the 'mad scientists' thing.

For the last time, I'm not a mad scientist! I don't do the whole build-a-monster-in-the-basement thing - instead, I build Inators on the top floor. It's really not that hard to keep straight - evil scientist. Not mad. Evil.

[And then he stops and looks at just who he's talking to. This is going to become a staring contest pretty quickly, isn't it.]

And now I'm talking with a giant cat.

...okaaaaaaay...

I didn't think there was a difference! You're still making doomsday weapons - mad or evil, it's still wrong.

[...

Yep. Sure is. Because Ratchet can't ever remember seeing your species before - and you don't have the ears or tail of a Markazian.

Okay, maybe the ears.]

Lombax, actually.

I'd watch my tongue; endangered species over here.

Oh, but there is. The society for mad scientists' acronym isn't nearly as cool as the one we evil scientists have.

[While that's not the only difference, obviously it's the most important one.]

A- what? A Lombax? What, do you speak for the trees or something?

...the trees are a few decks down, by the way. You can go speak to them there if you miss them or something.

...something tells me that's not something I wanna know and that I should be backing faaaaar away from this conversation.

[And he would... except for that little bite.]

--what? No! [Neither Fastoon or Veldin even had trees so joke's on you, Doofenshmirtz.] Though you might wanna go take a trip to Tabora - you and another guy there can go ponder the 'mysteries of the universe' or whatever.

He might charge you by the hour, but, well...

Sacrifices must be made?

Oooh, oooh, me! Pick me, pick me! I wanna play!

[...oh. Somehow, he wasn't expecting this.]

You know, I don't think you really got what I meant. I'm kind of staging a hostile takeover here with a really powerful laser. You- you really don't want to play with that. Trust me on this.

You can always surrender, though!

Oh...sorrrrrrrry, but I'm pretty sure 90s Kid said that we were never ever gonna surrender. Also a bunch of other stuff about how awesome we were! [She proudly holds up a laser gun with red markings.] We're on the same team!

You can still play with us too, though! Okay, okay, YOU be the evil bad guy, and WE can be the heroic good guys! And then next game, we'll switch!

[It's... Just a Cambot. No, not just any Cambot. Considering the odd movements and the scratches, along with the sudden lens readjustments that seem indicative of some of Riku's videos (generally when he's trying to get the thing to work right...)]

[Ceiling Cambot is watching you master-plan.]

Edited 2012-03-06 05:26 (UTC)

[Right now, Doof is a little too preoccupied with his plans to RULE THE SATELLITE OF LOVE to notice an extra Cambot hovering around. Give him a few, though, and he may well get around to it.]

[It moves forward. Yep, looking RIGHT over Doof's shoulder. Hm, but where's Riku? He's not here.]

Y'know, your doomsday weapons could use much better names.

[A purple pony is going to peer at this device, intrigued. No, she doesn't think it's capable of doing what it's supposed to do, why do you ask?]

What, exactly, does this machine accomplish?

[There might be a shadowy figure behind Doof, tiptoeing towards the laser...]

I must say, you've shown some great initiative here!

Am I supposed to be impressed?

[Yami Bakura smirks and crosses his arms at the play gun.]

Ooo, so scary. But I'm afraid you're mistaken about the Most Evil Person thing, because a new villian's in town.

[He pulls out a scimitar he pilfered from the weapons vault a couple days ago ((in the sneaky-sneak Adventure log from the minime profile)), and waves it expertly.]

And I'm British, baby!

[He calculates between his sword and that gun, and suddenly backs down.]

Actually, I think we may be able to help each other. Why should we be fighting like dogs when we could form a truce? I'm thinking of starting a club, an EVIL club. If this interests you, find me at this:((http://itsjustagamerp.dreamwidth.org/25041.html)) address and we'll talk.

Ta ta.

[He shoulders the sword and retreats.]

[Lexaeus thinks that the standards for Mad Scientists in this universe in general seem rather low. Vexen would certainly not be impressed, but then, Vexen rarely was. Well, there's more than one way to deal with difficult personalities, as Axel demonstrated.]

It is a pity that your laser gun would likely be ineffective against the Tom Servos on their own deck.

Fourinator

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Yami Power!

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