*There's a bit of static, at first. Then it clears up and WHOA that's a big head. The kid in front of it squints, tapping on the lens at first, then adjusts it a bit with his hands. Wee, twisty.*

It's working? Okay, it's working. *ahem*

Greetings, various citizens of the Satellite of Love! My name... is Razputin. But people call me... Raz.

*Well that was needlessly dramatic.*

Anyway, I've been briefed on the situation by the big purple bot that kinda looks like a hand vac. Including why I suddenly can't use any of my cool psychic powers anymore... B-but don't worry! I'm an official Psychonaut! I'm sure as soon as Psychonauts HQ realizes I've gone missing, they'll send a bunch of agents to come and save everybody! So just keep tight and keep your spirits up, and we'll all be saved in no time!

*Fzzzz*

Oh, hang on, the dang transmission's -- hey, what's this piece of bacon doing here? What a waste of -- *fzzzzz*